Mets Rat Is No Pizza Rat

At the time, it seemed harmless. This was in 2016 mind you (or was it 2015?), when the blog mines were thick with the dust from a million pickaxes, and a video of a rat dragging an entire slice of pizza shone like a beacon through the dark. And was it a conspiracy? Maybe, but it was delicious.

Yes, I bear some responsibility for Pizza Rat. I was in the room when it was blogged (this will be the subject of my forthcoming 15-episode podcast) and from what I recall, rooted for Pizza Rat to succeed and thus, produced more Pizza Rats. I thought Pizza Rat was fun. But didn't we all? (Don't answer this.) It's only human to smile at this zany amalgamation of New York City mascots—the first 300 times you see it, anyway.

Eventually, we collectively realized that these 45-second scenes of serendipity were actually everywhere, all the time. The world is full of trash and whether you watch pigeons fight over fried clams on City Island, or raccoons drag Starbucks dregs into a suburban parking lot, this shit just happens.

But it was too late. Pizza Rats had been deemed prime internet content—the people have spoken!—so we keep getting Churro Squirrels and Fondue Crows and all the rest. A Hitchcockian parade of banality, pecking our soft eyes out until they reach the warm marrow within, so we are primed to scroll through flatware guides. Pizza Rats have taken on an even grimmer significance in their hometown of New York, where, six years after everyone laughed at literal vermin dragging organic waste down a grimy subterranean stairwell, we keep chucking our trash out onto the street, for no good reason, ensuring that the cycle continues, until the world burns.

Anyway...

Move over Pizza Rat, because Nationals Stadium had a little visitor last night!

The Mets are 21-10.

Update: This blog post initially stated that the rat was on Citi Field, when in fact, the game was played in Washington, D.C., a rat-filled town if there ever was one.